One topic I never really thought about to myself a lot since I started teaching is the controversial nature of being a teacher without an education degree. Probably because I have been so focused on myself as a teacher, I never really thought about what others might consider of me when I tell them I never went through an education program at college. I did some google searching, and as I thought, non-education majors as teachers are not very well liked and the question of their effectiveness is the prime reason. But, then that raises the question: does having an education degree make you a more effective teacher than those who are not?
A little back ground about me: I graduated with a degree in Studio Art. Initially, I went to school to study animation, however after noticing that the job prospects were low and the financial toll was high, I left for studio art, specifically to become a teacher afterwards. I have always wanted to teach art, since high school, but the appeal of being able to work in animation steered me away. I also wanted my degree to be in Art Education specifically, but this would be require me to move out of town 2 hours away. So, I was told by my mentor that I can get alternatively certified if I get my degree in the subject I wanted to teach. And so, I did. And it worked. I graduated with a degree in Studio Art and I then went on to become Alternatively Certified, which requires some extra schooling while you teach. You can take courses on weekends, evenings, and summer.
I am sure that someone who has never had experience in a classroom suddenly being thrown in will not be quite as effective as someone who spent a semester or two in the classroom during college. But then again, I am sure there are some teachers who have that internship experience and yet they are still as ineffective as someone with no prior experience. A person's personal ability is the major factor here, not their experience nor their schooling. Teaching is a skill and a talent like anything else, and if you just don't have it, you may as well never have it. I have seen some people go into teaching and realize that very early on. They understand that despite all the schooling and prior experience they had before, they just weren't cut out to be teachers. Many leave by their 3rd year.
Prior to entering the classroom, I made sure I took on many teaching experiences to help prepare me for the real thing. I taught as a volunteer and I took small jobs as after school or summer camp counselors to make sure I could handle being around children. Very early on, I noticed I had an incredible knack for it. It all just clicked. When I was in front of the classroom, it all felt natural, easy, comfortable. Children would stare at me with eyes wide open, fingers crossed, ready to learn. I was naturally predisposed for teaching. No one taught me how to do it. No one showed me the way. I was thrown in and in the end, it all worked out. Now, I must admit, I lacked some useful skills an education major may have learned in college, but these were skills anyone can learn to do and they were skills that did not hinder my ability to teach.
Now back to the question of teacher effectiveness and education degrees: I'd say, it does not make a difference if you're not already naturally predisposed to teaching. If you cannot teach, you cannot teach. It's that simple. I cannot sing as beautifully as Mariah Carey can and I never will be able to, no matter how many singing lessons I take. An ineffective teacher will not be able to magically become effective no matter whether they have an education degree or not. Being an effective teacher has nothing to do with your education and everything to do with your talent. And you dare to disagree, just remember all those crappy teachers you had back in school. Did they ever get better? Probably not.
Teaching Confessions
..::To Teach is to Touch Lives Forever::..
Sunday, December 18, 2016
Wednesday, September 7, 2016
3rd year into teaching art - bad teachers
Thinking about running to this blog to get all of these nagging thoughts out of my mind got me excited for a while. I have actually always enjoyed taking the time to slow down and re-think anything I have thought before and form them into actual visible words on either paper or screen. Just something I've done since I've learned to read and write as a child. But lately, in the last year or so, that joy has waned. Well, I can't say that for sure. I still enjoy word vomit. I just find it harder to do. I find it harder to peel myself off the sofa, turn off the the mind numbing television and other various distractions (facebook, instagram, cellphone in general) and just sit and go within my own mind. Even now I have the TV running in the background, although on mute, I enjoy its ability to keep me up to date on meaningless and pointless little tidbits. Like that new CGI movie coming out, or that new company down the street that is hiring. You never know what you want to know!
But I digress. The whole point of me saying all of this is that I have been having a hard time forcing myself to sit down and get the words out. The words are there. The desire is there. The action is just not. I guess we can simply call that laziness.
One of the most persistent thoughts lately (with regards to teaching of course) has to do with my experience in high school and the teachers I had there. Well, what first initiated the thought was the question "why did you become a teacher?" and not only is the answer because I love art and I want to help share that love with others too but I also didn't like the teachers I had in high school. Just down right hated them actually. I always told myself "I could be so much better than that". I knew that teaching was so much more than what they were showing me, and I wanted to prove it. I had to prove it. I almost feel like some of my teachers gave on teaching, and I almost feel like some of my teachers gave up on some students specifically. Like me, for example. Like they saw me as a problem student and just turned away. But they had now idea that I actually enjoyed learning. I loved learning. I wanted to learn. I wanted to get better grades. They just didn't want to teach ME. They were problem teachers. I almost became bitter, in a way. I almost gave up on myself too.
And as far as art goes, I learned nothing. Just down right nothing it was not until I got into college that I began to actually learn how to be a real working artist and I saw what a terrible dis-service my art teacher in high school did to me. She had a degree in art yet she held her knowledge from me because she had no desire to teach. In fact, she often put down my work because she thought of it as being too immature. She cross her arms and shake her head and walk away, looking totally disappointed. She never accepted what I did. She was a terrible teacher. I always told myself I would never be like her.
And I'm not.
I teach my kids things I never learned in middle school, I never learned in high school. Things I never learned until college. By the time my students get to high school, they will know more than I did when I entered college. And you know what, I am damn proud of that. It was my goal to never be like the teachers I had in school. It was my goal to prove that they were bad teachers. And I did. I was I able to show that I am better than they ever will be. I think I am ready to keep moving forward.
Right now I am teaching middle school. And I hope to keep pushing to greater things. Who knows, maybe one day, I'll be a professor in college teaching other young adults how to become art teachers themselves.
Bah.
But I digress. The whole point of me saying all of this is that I have been having a hard time forcing myself to sit down and get the words out. The words are there. The desire is there. The action is just not. I guess we can simply call that laziness.
One of the most persistent thoughts lately (with regards to teaching of course) has to do with my experience in high school and the teachers I had there. Well, what first initiated the thought was the question "why did you become a teacher?" and not only is the answer because I love art and I want to help share that love with others too but I also didn't like the teachers I had in high school. Just down right hated them actually. I always told myself "I could be so much better than that". I knew that teaching was so much more than what they were showing me, and I wanted to prove it. I had to prove it. I almost feel like some of my teachers gave on teaching, and I almost feel like some of my teachers gave up on some students specifically. Like me, for example. Like they saw me as a problem student and just turned away. But they had now idea that I actually enjoyed learning. I loved learning. I wanted to learn. I wanted to get better grades. They just didn't want to teach ME. They were problem teachers. I almost became bitter, in a way. I almost gave up on myself too.
And as far as art goes, I learned nothing. Just down right nothing it was not until I got into college that I began to actually learn how to be a real working artist and I saw what a terrible dis-service my art teacher in high school did to me. She had a degree in art yet she held her knowledge from me because she had no desire to teach. In fact, she often put down my work because she thought of it as being too immature. She cross her arms and shake her head and walk away, looking totally disappointed. She never accepted what I did. She was a terrible teacher. I always told myself I would never be like her.
And I'm not.
I teach my kids things I never learned in middle school, I never learned in high school. Things I never learned until college. By the time my students get to high school, they will know more than I did when I entered college. And you know what, I am damn proud of that. It was my goal to never be like the teachers I had in school. It was my goal to prove that they were bad teachers. And I did. I was I able to show that I am better than they ever will be. I think I am ready to keep moving forward.
Right now I am teaching middle school. And I hope to keep pushing to greater things. Who knows, maybe one day, I'll be a professor in college teaching other young adults how to become art teachers themselves.
Bah.
Saturday, September 12, 2015
Differentiating Instruction
This new year, as I venture into teaching once more, I am now learning a new thing which I need to work on: differentiating instruction. This is not something I have been taught, however I have heard the term over and over and now I am beginning to realize why I need it so bad.
The way the classes at my school work is in sections. Each section stays together the whole school year and they each move from one class to the next together. Each section was not put together randomly though. Each student was selected for their section based on grades and testing scores. So brighter students are often seen in higher sections and slower students are all in their own lower sections. Unfortunately, I was prepared for this kind of class set up, and I quickly noticed that one lesson plan for the whole grade was not going to work. Lower sections and higher sections can NOT do the same work. First off, higher sections need more challenging work, and lower sections need easier work. Forgetting this concept, I went into the school year with one lesson plan for the whole grade and my lower sections suffered greatly for this. What I mean by suffer was that a lot of them struggled to understand and cope with the challenges of the lesson. I was a little perplexed at first, because there are some very basic things I expect from a middle schooler, basic things they should already know. But now I am beginning to realize that some students just don't have the ability to grasp even simple concepts. With that in mind, I am going to have to assess where these lower section students lie and figure out how to teach them basic things without going overboard.
I guess it is all about experience really, its a time thing. It's only the beginning of the year, so I am sure with some time I am going to figure these kids out and what they need and what they don't. I just wish I had this all in mind before starting this new year, but hey, at least I am learning and accepting that this is something I need to work on. Until next time...
The way the classes at my school work is in sections. Each section stays together the whole school year and they each move from one class to the next together. Each section was not put together randomly though. Each student was selected for their section based on grades and testing scores. So brighter students are often seen in higher sections and slower students are all in their own lower sections. Unfortunately, I was prepared for this kind of class set up, and I quickly noticed that one lesson plan for the whole grade was not going to work. Lower sections and higher sections can NOT do the same work. First off, higher sections need more challenging work, and lower sections need easier work. Forgetting this concept, I went into the school year with one lesson plan for the whole grade and my lower sections suffered greatly for this. What I mean by suffer was that a lot of them struggled to understand and cope with the challenges of the lesson. I was a little perplexed at first, because there are some very basic things I expect from a middle schooler, basic things they should already know. But now I am beginning to realize that some students just don't have the ability to grasp even simple concepts. With that in mind, I am going to have to assess where these lower section students lie and figure out how to teach them basic things without going overboard.
I guess it is all about experience really, its a time thing. It's only the beginning of the year, so I am sure with some time I am going to figure these kids out and what they need and what they don't. I just wish I had this all in mind before starting this new year, but hey, at least I am learning and accepting that this is something I need to work on. Until next time...
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Teaching so far....
I last updated this blog shortly before leaving to teach in South Korea. Wow. That was years ago. Since then, I was so ridiculously busy and exhausted, both physically and mentally, that I forgot I even had this blog to begin with (its more like a journal really). And when I did have random spurts of memory about it, I didn't have the energy to log on and update. Honestly, I feel too lazy even right now to be typing these words, but I think I have enough free time to jot a few things down anyway.
Honestly though, I think I just changed a bit. I no longer have the deep desire to write things out anymore. I actually don't think that is a good thing. I think writing is so essential to our development as thinking creatures, so I would like to have that deep desire return. I have probably just gotten so used to being lazy. It's probably that simple. Yeah, I do work harder now than I have before, during my college days, so that could be the reason why. I guess you can say I have acclimated to society. I am just another bland old cog in the machine, with no creative thoughts or desires. I can change that, but on a slow basis. I do have a job to focus on first.
Oh yeah! I am a teacher now! I went from dreaming and blogging about my desire to teach, to finally being a full time, salary paid teacher! It was an incredibly long journey, sadly too long, but hey, we can't all have smoothly paved roads. Some of us have to pave them ourselves.
After Korea, I finished up a few measly classes (Spanish 1 and II. Waste of time and money), which I tried to take in Miami and that ended up failing, finishing up a mural in a person's house, working in an office checking college level essays for grammatical errors, and then working in a child care facility making chump change and working with some of the most disgusting (personality wise) people I have ever met (that's child care for ya). I stayed there for about a year before I finally graduated, got my temp teaching certificate, and finally found a position in a charter school in January of 2015. I had a lot of ups and downs, definitely a lot of downs though, but I feel like despite being on that whirl-a-gig of a roller coaster, I ended up in a very good spot.
My first 6 months of teaching was an interesting experiment. I was being split between two schools in different counties that are owned by the same company. It was an easy interview; the principal spoke of herself more than I spoke of me... regardless, shortly after I quickly began to understand the meaning of workplace culture, especially in schools. I once read online that each school has it's own culture that may work for one person but become a total nightmare for another. One of these schools I taught at was a nightmare, while the other was my dream. By the end of the school year, I spoke with the principal of the school I enjoyed and decided to let him know that if I was not staying at his school the next school year, I won't be staying with the company. He shortly after confirmed that I was indeed going to be teaching at his school only the next year. I am eternally grateful to him for this... I didn't want to have to leave a school I was enjoying being at so much. The staff were friendly, the kids cared about their work, and the administration was caring and understanding. It wasn't the case at the other school. At the other school, the staff had already formed cliques by the time I had gotten there, so when I tried to socialize with them, they gave me these kind of "you cant sit with us" attitudes and looks. I soon found myself being an outcast at this school. Not to mention that I was sharing my classroom with the music teacher who seemed to find it appropriate to inform the principal that I was leaving paint on the tables instead of approaching me first. I ended up having a disagreement with the principal regarding this matter and it has left a bitter taste in my mouth ever since...
Students at both schools were also drastically different. I was wondering if it has anything to do with the neighborhoods that each school was in. The other school was in a slightly worse neighborhood than the one I am at now. I believe this made a huge difference in the behavior and attitude of the students. At the other school, the students were happy to get away with a C (I even had one student with a D say "well, that's passing, right?") while at the other, they were begging me to give them extra work so they can bring up their Bs. Even parents cared more at the school I am at now than the other. It was so drastic of a difference, it was like night and day. Just another reason why I didn't want to stay at the other school. I would have jumped off a cliff if I did. Schools like those are the reason why many teachers think that teaching isn't for them and quit their first year. It's not you! It's the school!
Well, let by gones be by gones. I am in a better place now and hopefully it stays wonderful for a very long time. Right now, my goal is to focus on lesson planning and curriculum until it becomes second nature to me. And after that happens, I want to try and see if I can get an art show set up. Either way, I'm optimistic about my future as an educator and I am planning for many more years to come.
Honestly though, I think I just changed a bit. I no longer have the deep desire to write things out anymore. I actually don't think that is a good thing. I think writing is so essential to our development as thinking creatures, so I would like to have that deep desire return. I have probably just gotten so used to being lazy. It's probably that simple. Yeah, I do work harder now than I have before, during my college days, so that could be the reason why. I guess you can say I have acclimated to society. I am just another bland old cog in the machine, with no creative thoughts or desires. I can change that, but on a slow basis. I do have a job to focus on first.
Oh yeah! I am a teacher now! I went from dreaming and blogging about my desire to teach, to finally being a full time, salary paid teacher! It was an incredibly long journey, sadly too long, but hey, we can't all have smoothly paved roads. Some of us have to pave them ourselves.
After Korea, I finished up a few measly classes (Spanish 1 and II. Waste of time and money), which I tried to take in Miami and that ended up failing, finishing up a mural in a person's house, working in an office checking college level essays for grammatical errors, and then working in a child care facility making chump change and working with some of the most disgusting (personality wise) people I have ever met (that's child care for ya). I stayed there for about a year before I finally graduated, got my temp teaching certificate, and finally found a position in a charter school in January of 2015. I had a lot of ups and downs, definitely a lot of downs though, but I feel like despite being on that whirl-a-gig of a roller coaster, I ended up in a very good spot.
My first 6 months of teaching was an interesting experiment. I was being split between two schools in different counties that are owned by the same company. It was an easy interview; the principal spoke of herself more than I spoke of me... regardless, shortly after I quickly began to understand the meaning of workplace culture, especially in schools. I once read online that each school has it's own culture that may work for one person but become a total nightmare for another. One of these schools I taught at was a nightmare, while the other was my dream. By the end of the school year, I spoke with the principal of the school I enjoyed and decided to let him know that if I was not staying at his school the next school year, I won't be staying with the company. He shortly after confirmed that I was indeed going to be teaching at his school only the next year. I am eternally grateful to him for this... I didn't want to have to leave a school I was enjoying being at so much. The staff were friendly, the kids cared about their work, and the administration was caring and understanding. It wasn't the case at the other school. At the other school, the staff had already formed cliques by the time I had gotten there, so when I tried to socialize with them, they gave me these kind of "you cant sit with us" attitudes and looks. I soon found myself being an outcast at this school. Not to mention that I was sharing my classroom with the music teacher who seemed to find it appropriate to inform the principal that I was leaving paint on the tables instead of approaching me first. I ended up having a disagreement with the principal regarding this matter and it has left a bitter taste in my mouth ever since...
Students at both schools were also drastically different. I was wondering if it has anything to do with the neighborhoods that each school was in. The other school was in a slightly worse neighborhood than the one I am at now. I believe this made a huge difference in the behavior and attitude of the students. At the other school, the students were happy to get away with a C (I even had one student with a D say "well, that's passing, right?") while at the other, they were begging me to give them extra work so they can bring up their Bs. Even parents cared more at the school I am at now than the other. It was so drastic of a difference, it was like night and day. Just another reason why I didn't want to stay at the other school. I would have jumped off a cliff if I did. Schools like those are the reason why many teachers think that teaching isn't for them and quit their first year. It's not you! It's the school!
Well, let by gones be by gones. I am in a better place now and hopefully it stays wonderful for a very long time. Right now, my goal is to focus on lesson planning and curriculum until it becomes second nature to me. And after that happens, I want to try and see if I can get an art show set up. Either way, I'm optimistic about my future as an educator and I am planning for many more years to come.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
The challenges I face at MOSI
Since it's been 3 weeks of teaching now at MOSI, I can now make some observations about the challenges I face there while teaching. Oddly enough, it's not the kids themselves that I find challenging, especially since I have experience teaching in low-income neighborhoods before teaching these kids. It's other various unnecessary things, some beyond my control, others not.
The first and most important challenge I faced was writing my week long curriculum. The first thing that made this challenging was the lack of detailed information about what the class should be about. I don't think this was a mistake on MOSI's part (although I don't agree with their methodology) as I was told during the interview that teachers are expected to write the entire class curriculum and that the entire class itself was at the discretion of the teacher. Now, this wouldn't have been so hard had the mini class descriptions we were given had been far more detailed. For example, I had one class description for an online web design class for kids that mentioned using animation, music, and photography to make a web site, and the more and more I read it, the less sense it made. I simply cannot find the correlation between animation, music, photography and web design! Of course, you can make animation, music, and photography and put those things on your website, but these skills do little to aid in the actual design and creation of a website. I tried all these things, actually, and found out the the kids JUST wanted to make a website. All that extra stuff was just getting in the way of doing that. Funny huh?
The second part that made teaching challenging was the fact that I had the kids for 6 hours (7 minus lunch). I had to teach them something.... for 6 hours straight?! At first, I didn't realize how odd it was, but once put into practice, you start to see the insanity of it. I was trying to keep them occupied every hour, but no matter what lessons I threw at them, they finished it within an hour and didn't want to go back and do it again. Of course, I could have made them do it again, but this is camp, not school. I didn't want them to be miserable and bored, ya know? I started to think about it, and I was wondering if the problem was me, maybe my lessons and curriculum were really just not that good, and then I realized something important: wait, in any school, in any class, and any grade level is no teacher made to teach the same subject for 6 hours straight! Your math, English, computer, art, science, etc are all taught for about 45 minutes to an hour and a half each, depending on the school schedule, and often by different teachers. In college, the max is 3 hours, but those are for work classes, in which the professor teaches for the first hour and then allows the students to work the rest of the time on their work, and as adults, we have the ability to focus that long without needing more work from our professors. So now, it's got me wondering... what if MOSI is the one doing it wrong? Well, apparently, they have been doing this for 30 years, so perhaps they aren't and I really am just making bad curricula... I wish I knew, because I honestly am trying to be a better teacher. It's my career goal, after all. I want to improve...
And finally, I had some serious technology problems that I wasn't sure whether it was my fault or not (although I was told that it wasn't). I was given very old and very ancient mini mac computers for the kids. The OS on these machines haven't been upgraded since they first got them. Some of them had the very first version of firefox! Woah (and in case you didn't know, firefox has about 13 versions of their web browser out now, so that's a whole lotta upgrading that was not done to these macs). Some didn't even have flash and others were hooked up to those huge CRT monitors that I didn't even think a place like MOSI would still have. Honestly, it felt like me and my class got the poop end of the stick here. I felt belittled and angry. MOSI did have a set of ASUS gamer republic laptops, and I knew this because I've used them in previous classes before. So I wondered, why am I not using those? I was told the week before I could, so might as well forget these garbage mini macs and go back to the PCs. To make the long story short, I had trouble getting those PCs for my class for reasons I am still unsure of, but when I spoke to my directors about it, they told me that I should be allowed to use them and no one should tell me otherwise. I got them for one whole day after that and that was it.... still not sure I understand why. Honestly, I am still wondering why those PCs were not reserved for my class (those kids parents PAID for them to be there after all). And I don't understand why I was expected to use old mini macs that had software issues up the butt and why I had to do countless amounts of IT work on them just to make them somewhat okay to use when they apparently had an IT guy... I still don't get it, and I wish it was better explained to me. I just wanted to teach the kids something.... Funny thing is, that one day that I got the laptop PCs for the whole day was the most productive, for the kids, in the entire week. They got so much work done... it's sad that they were not allowed to use them again...
Despite the issues I had, I am not unhappy about my experience. Every challenge I face I am grateful for, because that is just something new I can now handle in the future. I now know more about macs then I ever did before, and I I know a little more about IT stuff than before. So I learned a little something in this process to. The only thing I wish I could have had was some information... I just wanted to know what in the world was going on so I didn't have to constantly wonder.
On top of that, the kids were still amazing. They were fully capable, they were interested, and they were kind. They were unbelievably chatty and they seem to have an obsession for computer games, but despite that, they made it all so worth it. Children are such beautiful human beings, they express so much happiness and joy that sometimes I forget human beings, child and adult alike, are capable of such happiness and kindness.
Monday, June 25, 2012
Anxieties over South Korea
On August 4th of 2012, I will make my first ever trip out of the country, which will also involve my first ever ride on an airplane. It will also include my first ever time living in another country, my first ever time being away from my family and boyfriend for 6 months and my first time teaching English as a foreign language. I'm ready to go, I think, but the anxiety is killing me. So much so, that I am having a really hard time focusing on other things right now, which is not a good thing at all.
So much is required to prepare for the trip. I got my passport for the first time and applied for my visa. I bought suitcases and my carry-on bag, and I have plastic boxes to fill with things I can't take with me for storage purposes. I've got a lot of things to go through...
My new jobs are helping to fund for my trip to Korea, which is a huge help. I just wish the jobs weren't so mentally and physically intensive; It makes it so much harder to do well for those jobs. I have bought my basic toiletries, and I have some clothes to take as well. I am just hoping it is all enough...
Mental preparation is going to be a lot harder to do though. I can't get over how much I am going to miss my boyfriend of 5 years. I trust him enough that I know we will make it through these 6 months, but I really don't know how I am going to handle being so far away from him for so long. We're currently spoiled: 3 minute drive away and very few things holding us from being able to see each other. Never went more than a week without seeing him. Just 2 days makes me terribly lonely... I'm not gonna lie, sometimes, I cry when I think about it. I'm a big baby, I know I am, so I'm afraid of what to expect. It's a rather large leap though. If I was moving within the country, that would be a lot easier to handle. But I am going to practically be on the other side of the planet. Pretty far :/
I worry about my family while I am away. I am sure they'll be fine, but I can't help but worry. It's only natural. I'll leave behind good friends, but all we live so far away already, it shouldn't be much different, right? Haha. I know I am going to miss my dog, Bongo. I really do love that dog, and he helps to bring up my mood when I am down like no human being can... so it's going to be really depressing not having him there. I have thought about taking him, but I know I can't. It's just a wish.
I am also worried about whether or not I am doing everything right. I just want the trip to go smoothly. I hope I don't lose nay luggage, get lost, miss a plane, or have trouble with communication. I hope people aren't rude or snooty and will understand my anxiety. I hope I don't screw up in a massive way.
On top of all that is my phobia of airplanes. I don't know how one can be phobic of riding airplanes having never been on one, but from what I hear, the experience of actually doing it is what helps to relive some of that stress. I've been watching videos of people riding airplanes and it does make me feel a little better seeing how smooth it really is. The thought of being trapped inside that tube for so many hours with the possibility of death always there certainly doesn't make me feel better though. Honestly, I can imagine myself getting queasy or fainting from nervousness (which I do).
When the day comes closer, I am sure my anxiety will increase for all the reasons above. Right now, I have about a month left. I wish I could spend it relaxing and not having to worry... but I can relax when I get there, right?
So much is required to prepare for the trip. I got my passport for the first time and applied for my visa. I bought suitcases and my carry-on bag, and I have plastic boxes to fill with things I can't take with me for storage purposes. I've got a lot of things to go through...
My new jobs are helping to fund for my trip to Korea, which is a huge help. I just wish the jobs weren't so mentally and physically intensive; It makes it so much harder to do well for those jobs. I have bought my basic toiletries, and I have some clothes to take as well. I am just hoping it is all enough...
Mental preparation is going to be a lot harder to do though. I can't get over how much I am going to miss my boyfriend of 5 years. I trust him enough that I know we will make it through these 6 months, but I really don't know how I am going to handle being so far away from him for so long. We're currently spoiled: 3 minute drive away and very few things holding us from being able to see each other. Never went more than a week without seeing him. Just 2 days makes me terribly lonely... I'm not gonna lie, sometimes, I cry when I think about it. I'm a big baby, I know I am, so I'm afraid of what to expect. It's a rather large leap though. If I was moving within the country, that would be a lot easier to handle. But I am going to practically be on the other side of the planet. Pretty far :/
I worry about my family while I am away. I am sure they'll be fine, but I can't help but worry. It's only natural. I'll leave behind good friends, but all we live so far away already, it shouldn't be much different, right? Haha. I know I am going to miss my dog, Bongo. I really do love that dog, and he helps to bring up my mood when I am down like no human being can... so it's going to be really depressing not having him there. I have thought about taking him, but I know I can't. It's just a wish.
I am also worried about whether or not I am doing everything right. I just want the trip to go smoothly. I hope I don't lose nay luggage, get lost, miss a plane, or have trouble with communication. I hope people aren't rude or snooty and will understand my anxiety. I hope I don't screw up in a massive way.
On top of all that is my phobia of airplanes. I don't know how one can be phobic of riding airplanes having never been on one, but from what I hear, the experience of actually doing it is what helps to relive some of that stress. I've been watching videos of people riding airplanes and it does make me feel a little better seeing how smooth it really is. The thought of being trapped inside that tube for so many hours with the possibility of death always there certainly doesn't make me feel better though. Honestly, I can imagine myself getting queasy or fainting from nervousness (which I do).
When the day comes closer, I am sure my anxiety will increase for all the reasons above. Right now, I have about a month left. I wish I could spend it relaxing and not having to worry... but I can relax when I get there, right?
What's going on at the Museum of Science & Industry?
The next stop in my journey through teaching and education is MOSI, the Museum of Science & Industry! I currently work here as a "Technology Instructor" for the Museums Summer Science Camp. I recently finished my first week and I believe I should take some time to reflect on my experience there. There is just so much to say; It was quite possibly one of the most exhausting and hectic week of my life. Despite that, it has also been so incredibly satisfying. These kids are the bread and butter of why someone becomes a teacher.... So let's get started!
Curriculum and Lesson Planning:
This is probably the part of the week I found the most difficult. I had a curriculum firmly set in place, but after the first day, I realized the students needed more than what I had planned. First off, I taught something that was actually quite new to me: game design for kids. I created a curriculum for the week and was ready to go! I thought it was going to be wonderful, because the software I was using, Kodu, had so much hype built around it on the internet, especially by Microsoft, who developed the program. After the first day, the students got the program but were unable to move forward with it in the manner I hoped for. It was so educational, they got bored of it. Sad, huh? They were hoping for something for along the lines of Roblox or Minecraft (God, I hate those games). Kodu was supposed to teach programming and logic, something 8-9 year olds are not particularly interested unless they're kid geniuses. Because of this, I tossed out my curriculum and went back to the drawing board... every single night. Despite this, I was still able to find new programs for them to learn every single day as there are a plethora of game design programs for kids out there. They loved them for 2 hours or so, but after that, they went right back to whatever else they were interested in. Well, it was my first time teaching this subject but after this week, I think I feel a little better about teaching it again. Experience is everything when it comes to teaching.
Asperger's Syndrome
I've had special needs children in classes before at the Tampa Housing Authority, but they were never problems. They never made a fuss and they never acted out. In fact, despite their odd behavior, they were absolutely brilliant. I loved them! But this was my first time having a kid with aspergers in my class. I knew it existed, but I never knew what it was about. I have done some research, but despite that, I still don't completely understand it. I guess this is the problem with the fact that I didn't go to college for an education degree, so I wasn't forced to study this stuff in school. What I do know, is that is related to autism in some way and that the main problems people with this disorder have is their abnormal social behavior and communication. The main problems I had with this student was that he tended to have a mental break down every time something went even slightly wrong. For example, if the computer froze, he would bring is legs to his chest, pull his hair, and begin to cry and scream. He would then begin to whine about the situation and often repeat his words a few times before getting up to pace the room and find someones computer to steal. What I found incredibly interesting was how a few of the kids in the class would actually try to help calm him down and they were just.... wow. They would make eye contact with him and say things like "it's okay, you can have my computer". It was just amazing how empathetic 8-9 year olds can be! It showed that our human nature of love and care starts at an early age... despite this, there is also another side of human nature that begins at an early age: cruelty.
Bullying
I've dealt with bullying before, but never to this extant. It got to the point were it was starting to get completely absurd. I always thought bullies like this were only in movies, but this week taught me that those bullies are very real. The bully was a nice kid, he really was, but he seemed to pick out specific kids in the class and pick on them in one way or another, and usually this picking involved physical contact, which for some reason, he did not get the severity of. First, he drew on one kid with a pen after taking the pen away from him. Then, he pushed the kid with aspergers into a water bottle, causing the water to spill and the kid to break down crying. Then, he grabbed a plush toy that belonged to a little girl in the class and questioned her about it in a rather mean manner causing her to cry. Then, during a conversation with other boys about who is the toughest, he randomly picks the quiet kid and points out that he is the weakest, causing him to cry also. It doesn't end there! Then, while walking to lunch, he pushes the kid with aspergers against the wall because he was in his way. And finally, while taking the kids out to play, for some odd reason, he slaps another kid in the butt.
So much happened by this one bully in one week with so many different victims, that I am honestly perplexed as to the reason behind such behavior and he inability to stop, even for one day. I am still in the process of understanding and learning, so maybe one day I will get it. Of course, i always hear about how it is something going on at home, but I honestly don't care about what is going on at home. I don't think that is any excuse to let a bully be a bully. Yes, I did contact my camp directors about this, and I asked to have him removed from the class. They wanted me to give him a chance. Next time, I won't be giving chances. If a student won't behave, by Friday, they're out.
Parent Interaction
Something I am definitely not used to is parent interaction as a teacher. Before, I worked in communities and neighborhoods where most parents could not give a rats arse what activities their kids were doing outside the home, so you heard of the less and saw them never. At MOSI, that was the opposite. Well, I saw the parents at least twice a day for sign in and sign out, and so that increased the interaction ten fold. I gotta admit I was incredibly nervous communicating with them and talking to them. I mostly worried about whether they were judging me or not, whether they thought I was doing a good job or not, etc. Also, because of the bully, I had some parents come to me with concerns, and it was a surprise to me. I did not know the kid would tell their parents, but I guess I should have expected it. I had one parent tell me that she was not afraid to talk to the parent of the bully, and I had to reassure her that I would take care of it although it was my first time dealing with it. I also had one parent come to me with concerns that his son was playing a video with blood and killing in it. I was so surprised that a parent actually cared about that! A good surprised of course. I was always under the impression that most parents these days don't care what horrible games their kids play. I was a little embarrassed too though. The game was NOT in my curriculum, but I let the kids play it during free time (the game was given to me by a co-worker). So I gotta watch out for that from now on.
Above are just a few of the points I wanted to cover about my one week experience at MOSI so far. I have 3 more weeks to go and I am excited to experience them. I just I didn't have the anxiety from having to travel to South Korea looming over me... it's making things so so much harder for me right now... I think I am going to have to blog about Korea too, just so I can get all this anxiety out of me right now :S
Curriculum and Lesson Planning:
This is probably the part of the week I found the most difficult. I had a curriculum firmly set in place, but after the first day, I realized the students needed more than what I had planned. First off, I taught something that was actually quite new to me: game design for kids. I created a curriculum for the week and was ready to go! I thought it was going to be wonderful, because the software I was using, Kodu, had so much hype built around it on the internet, especially by Microsoft, who developed the program. After the first day, the students got the program but were unable to move forward with it in the manner I hoped for. It was so educational, they got bored of it. Sad, huh? They were hoping for something for along the lines of Roblox or Minecraft (God, I hate those games). Kodu was supposed to teach programming and logic, something 8-9 year olds are not particularly interested unless they're kid geniuses. Because of this, I tossed out my curriculum and went back to the drawing board... every single night. Despite this, I was still able to find new programs for them to learn every single day as there are a plethora of game design programs for kids out there. They loved them for 2 hours or so, but after that, they went right back to whatever else they were interested in. Well, it was my first time teaching this subject but after this week, I think I feel a little better about teaching it again. Experience is everything when it comes to teaching.
Asperger's Syndrome
I've had special needs children in classes before at the Tampa Housing Authority, but they were never problems. They never made a fuss and they never acted out. In fact, despite their odd behavior, they were absolutely brilliant. I loved them! But this was my first time having a kid with aspergers in my class. I knew it existed, but I never knew what it was about. I have done some research, but despite that, I still don't completely understand it. I guess this is the problem with the fact that I didn't go to college for an education degree, so I wasn't forced to study this stuff in school. What I do know, is that is related to autism in some way and that the main problems people with this disorder have is their abnormal social behavior and communication. The main problems I had with this student was that he tended to have a mental break down every time something went even slightly wrong. For example, if the computer froze, he would bring is legs to his chest, pull his hair, and begin to cry and scream. He would then begin to whine about the situation and often repeat his words a few times before getting up to pace the room and find someones computer to steal. What I found incredibly interesting was how a few of the kids in the class would actually try to help calm him down and they were just.... wow. They would make eye contact with him and say things like "it's okay, you can have my computer". It was just amazing how empathetic 8-9 year olds can be! It showed that our human nature of love and care starts at an early age... despite this, there is also another side of human nature that begins at an early age: cruelty.
Bullying
I've dealt with bullying before, but never to this extant. It got to the point were it was starting to get completely absurd. I always thought bullies like this were only in movies, but this week taught me that those bullies are very real. The bully was a nice kid, he really was, but he seemed to pick out specific kids in the class and pick on them in one way or another, and usually this picking involved physical contact, which for some reason, he did not get the severity of. First, he drew on one kid with a pen after taking the pen away from him. Then, he pushed the kid with aspergers into a water bottle, causing the water to spill and the kid to break down crying. Then, he grabbed a plush toy that belonged to a little girl in the class and questioned her about it in a rather mean manner causing her to cry. Then, during a conversation with other boys about who is the toughest, he randomly picks the quiet kid and points out that he is the weakest, causing him to cry also. It doesn't end there! Then, while walking to lunch, he pushes the kid with aspergers against the wall because he was in his way. And finally, while taking the kids out to play, for some odd reason, he slaps another kid in the butt.
So much happened by this one bully in one week with so many different victims, that I am honestly perplexed as to the reason behind such behavior and he inability to stop, even for one day. I am still in the process of understanding and learning, so maybe one day I will get it. Of course, i always hear about how it is something going on at home, but I honestly don't care about what is going on at home. I don't think that is any excuse to let a bully be a bully. Yes, I did contact my camp directors about this, and I asked to have him removed from the class. They wanted me to give him a chance. Next time, I won't be giving chances. If a student won't behave, by Friday, they're out.
Parent Interaction
Something I am definitely not used to is parent interaction as a teacher. Before, I worked in communities and neighborhoods where most parents could not give a rats arse what activities their kids were doing outside the home, so you heard of the less and saw them never. At MOSI, that was the opposite. Well, I saw the parents at least twice a day for sign in and sign out, and so that increased the interaction ten fold. I gotta admit I was incredibly nervous communicating with them and talking to them. I mostly worried about whether they were judging me or not, whether they thought I was doing a good job or not, etc. Also, because of the bully, I had some parents come to me with concerns, and it was a surprise to me. I did not know the kid would tell their parents, but I guess I should have expected it. I had one parent tell me that she was not afraid to talk to the parent of the bully, and I had to reassure her that I would take care of it although it was my first time dealing with it. I also had one parent come to me with concerns that his son was playing a video with blood and killing in it. I was so surprised that a parent actually cared about that! A good surprised of course. I was always under the impression that most parents these days don't care what horrible games their kids play. I was a little embarrassed too though. The game was NOT in my curriculum, but I let the kids play it during free time (the game was given to me by a co-worker). So I gotta watch out for that from now on.
Above are just a few of the points I wanted to cover about my one week experience at MOSI so far. I have 3 more weeks to go and I am excited to experience them. I just I didn't have the anxiety from having to travel to South Korea looming over me... it's making things so so much harder for me right now... I think I am going to have to blog about Korea too, just so I can get all this anxiety out of me right now :S
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)